‘American Horror Story’: Hallow-queens

zachary-quinto-ahs.jpg“American Horror Story” took on Halloween with the first episode of the holiday two-parter. What did you think?

We definitely were creeped out to see the return of Dr. Montgomery, his wife Nora and their underground abortion clinic. In an icky twist, the boyfriend of one of their patients kidnaps their baby (the call’s coming from INSIDE THE HOUSE!) and chops him up. Poor kid. Though also poor kid for having those two as his parents. And then drunk and crazy Dr. Montgomery tries to sew him back together.

Meanwhile, the most recent owners before Ben and Vivien were gay couple Chad and Patrick, who were murdered by the Rubber S&M Suit Man. Well, Chad was. Patrick’s fate remains to be seen. They called it a murder-suicide in the pilot, but we suspect the suicide was staged.

Those three (Chad, Patrick and RS&MSM) are now haunting the house for Halloween and the big cliffhanger is that Violet is missing after RS&MSM came up behind her. But she’s probably off with Tate, right? We saw him in the suit early in the episode and a rubber S&M suit shown in the first act has to go off in the third act, so says the theatre adage.

In what would have been the most disturbing B-plot of the week, if not for the Montgomery family, was that Addie just wants to be a pretty girl for Halloween, so Constance, in all her motherly wisdom, gives her a rubber mask. Because Addie can’t be pretty on her own.

Addie wears it, runs into the street, doesn’t see an oncoming car and is brutally run down. We aren’t sure if she’s dead – Constance was adamant about dragging her back to the house, so maybe its magical powers will save her?

Speaking of children, Vivien has some pregnancy pains that feel like the (eight-week-old) fetus is kicking, which is not possible. At the hospital, the nurse faints upon seeing the sonogram. But we never come back to that. Is it a fly larva? We hope it’s a fly larva.

And randomly (is it in their contracts they appear every week), Moira takes her mother off the ventilator and Burned Man shows up demanding his headshot money.

What did you think, “American Horror Story” fans? Still on board?

Photo/Video credit: NBC

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