So when Dancing with the Stars told us it was doing Cirque du Soleil, we were a little cirque du skeptical.
We usually associate that show with a level of skill that we might be more likely to see closer to the end of the season, and we also feared that the theme would mean a whole lot of our greatest DWTS pet peeve: too much stuff on the stage.
That did happen tonight, but not as often as we feared (and not to the person we feared for the most), but for the most part, the theme was a lot of fun.
Tonight’s show gave us some really incredible numbers, and even the season’s first perfect score! We’ll give you one guess as to whose dance got it…
Babyface and Allison Holker: 18/30
Oof. We still love you and your dancing and that one time you tangoed to the X-Files theme, Babyface. Don’t let this week get you down.
Marilu Henner and Derek Hough: 21/30
Poor Marilu was one of tonight’s biggest sufferers of the “Too Much Stuff” disease. The other dancers were distracting, Derek’s makeup was distracting, and there was an awful lot of fire. The dancing was cool from what we could see, but it got a little lost in the theatrics.
Vanilla Ice and Witney Carson: 23/30
Like the judges said, this theme worked well for him and his facial hair. Best dance he’s done all season.
Jana Kramer and Gleb Chigvintsev: 23/30
Cute, but oddly boring for as much as we usually like this song and this couple.
Amber Rose and Maks Chmerkovskiy: 24/30
Finally! Amber got to dance without a wig and without a stage full of props and other distractions, and she did a pretty good job. She always seems like she’s struggling a bit to keep up with Maks, but not bad.
Maureen McCormick and Artem Chigvintsev: 24/30
This one was verging on Too Much Stuff and it seems like Maureen is so tense every time she dances, but otherwise this was a nice improvement.
Calvin Johnson and Lindsay Arnold: 23/30
We loved Calvin from the beginning but the last two dances have definitely put him in our top four. He’s just a whole lot of fun.
Terra Jole and Sasha Farber: 25/30
Best dance Terra has ever done, and one of the most fun performances of the night. That nine was well deserved!
James Hinchcliffe and Sharna Burgess: 28/30
To us, this is how you do a theatrical dance. James was the star of the show, and we could see him at all times regardless of whatever else was happening. He also just to happened to totally kill it.
Laurie Hernandez and Val Chmerkovskiy:
Holy fork! Her Michael Jackson was goddamn magical, and just like with James’ dance, it was genius to make her the star as opposed to one half of a couple. Our only complaint is that if any night was a good night to break out the gymnastics, it was Cirque du Soleil night, and yet there were none.
Who had your favorite dance of the night? Sound off in the comments!
Dancing with the Stars airs Mondays and Tuesdays at 8 p.m. on ABC.