Movie Review: Zoe Saldana Is Killer, Even If Colombiana’s a Botched Hit

Review in a Hurry: Lt. Uhura wants to kill Bill—or something like that. Zoe Saldana (Star Trek, Avatar) plays a sexy contract killer who puts her parents’ murderers in her vengeful crosshairs. A slick actioner from assassin-genre godfather Luc Besson, Colombiana is often preposterous but never boring.

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The Bigger Picture: If Anne Hathaway hadn’t already bagged Catwoman in the next Dark Night sequel, Saldana would’ve made a great choice. As Colombiana proves, the slinky beauty can prowl around in tight bodysuits, nimbly bound across buildings and dispatch villains with feline ferocity. What’s most impressive, however, is how Saldana helps this laughably over-the-top revenge flick land on its feet.

In early ’90s Bogota, schoolgirl Cataleya (Amandla Stenberg)—named for a Colombian orchid—witnesses her folks being slaughtered by mobsters. She escapes by knifing one baddie and outrunning the others (at least Hanna explained its young heroine’s steely strength), then hooks up with her Uncle Emilio (Cliff Curtis), a gangsta in Chicago.

Fifteen years later, Cataleya (now Saldana) works with Emilio as a professional hit woman. But in her personal time, it’s personal, bitches: She seeks vengeance against the drug kingpins responsible for Mama and Papi’s murders. She leaves a calling card on her victims’ bodies—the drawing of an orchid—which attracts the top mobster’s attention but also puts the FBI on her trail.