This weekend let’s all get VERY political and OCCUPY OUR LIVING ROOMS!!
What to watch on Friday, October 14…
Sam and Dean track down an angry Egyptian god who puts people on trial for their wrongdoings. But get this: DEAN gets put on trial for HIS wrongdoings! (My Bloody Valentine shouldn’t count against him, in my opinion.)
Nikita’s presumed-dead former partner ends up being ALIVE, so the race is on to retrieve her from Turkey before Alex and Roan do. (Unrelated question: Have any of these characters ever worn, say, bright green? Just curious.)
Olivia decides she needs to pay a visit to Massive Dynamic and also that she must drag Walter along with her, despite the fact that he really does not like to leave his lab. I’m with Walter! I haven’t even worn shoes in what feels like weeks.
ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 8pm, Animal Planet
Bite of the Living Dead
Haha, zombie puns, am I right? Anyway, don’t get excited, there are next to no zombies in this Animal Planet special. Instead we’ll learn all about a pair of incidents in which two people suffer snakebites but only one of them survives. Throw in some voodoo and we’ve really got something here.
PLUS NEW EPISODES OF…
A Gifted Man, 8 p.m., CBS
Kitchen Nightmares, 8 p.m., FOX
Star Wars: The Clone Wars, 8 p.m., Cartoon Network
Wizards of Waverly Place, 8 p.m., Disney Channel
CSI: NY, 9 p.m., CBS
Dateline NBC, 9 p.m., NBC
I Shouldn’t Be Alive, 9 & 10 p.m., Animal Planet
Man, Woman, Wild, 9 p.m., Discovery
20/20, 10 p.m., ABC
Blue Bloods, 10 p.m., CBS
Real Time with Bill Maher, 10 p.m., HBO
Sanctuary, 10 p.m., Syfy
Strike Back, 10 p.m., Cinemax
The Soup, 10 p.m., E!
Twisted, 10 p.m., Investigation Discovery
Anime Iron Man, SEASON 1 FINALE, 11 p.m., G4
Anime Wolverine, SEASON 1 FINALE, 11:30 p.m., G4
Anthony Mackie on The Wendy Williams Show, 12 a.m., BET
Beirut on Late Show with David Letterman, 11:35 p.m., CBS
Foster the People on Last Call with Carson Daly, 1:35 a.m., NBC
Liza Minnelli & Adam Pally on Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson, 12:37 a.m., CBS
Matthew Broderick on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, 12:35 a.m., NBC
Rowan Atkinson on Tonight Show with Jay Leno, 11:35 p.m., NBC
What to watch on Saturday, October 15…
Saturday Night Live
Yes to this: ANNA FARIS hosts tonight’s show. Maybe to this: DRAKE is the musical guest! Is he good? The only R&B I know is “Return of the Mack.”
ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 11pm, Comedy Central
Craig Ferguson: Does This Need to Be Said?
In a rare non talk-show-hosting appearance, the second-most important man of CBS late night brings us this Comedy Central stand-up special, in which he’ll muse on the current states of pop culture, celebrities, and his own well-being. And all with that charming Scottish accent!
ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 10pm, Showtime
Margaret Cho: Cho Dependent
She may lack a Scottish accent, but she more than makes up for it with her gay fan base. Tonight Margaret Cho brings her newest stand-up set to Showtime, where she’ll address such hot-button issues as sex, drugs, politics, and sexting in addition to devoting forty or so minutes to impressions of her mother.
SERIES PREMIERE, 8pm, Animal Planet
Puppies vs. Babies
This BLOODY and BRUTAL match-up has been a long time coming, folks. Tonight Animal Planet brings us the tournament of tournaments to finally decide which species of cuteness deserves our attention more: infant dogs or post-natal human beings! To paraphrase one of the finest taglines of all time: Whoever Wins, WE WIN.
PLUS NEW EPISODES OF…
Dogs 101, 8 p.m., Animal Planet
Victorious, 9 p.m., Nickelodeon
Big Time Rush, 8:30 p.m., Nickelodeon
How to Be a Gentleman, 8:30 p.m., CBS
Bedlam, 9 p.m., BBC America
Suze Orman Show, 9 p.m., CNBC
48 Hours Mystery, 10 p.m., CBS
Bizarre E.R., 10 p.m., Discovery Fit & Health
Free Agents (U.K.), 11 p.m., BBC America
Rickey Smiley: Live From Atlanta, ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 11:30 p.m., BET
What to watch on Sunday, October 16…
SEASON 2 PREMIERE, 9pm, AMC
The Walking Dead
It’s been a long, frustrating year since The Walking Dead‘s all-too-short first season ended, particularly for much-respected show creator Frank Darabont. Though his dismissal was widely lamented by fans, we’re just all so stoked to have horrifying zombies back on television that tonight’s Season 2 premiere remains must-see TV. After the events at the Center for Disease Control, Rick and his posse attempt to leave Georgia but run into a pretty horrible problem on the highway. Pro tip: Finish eating your dinner BEFORE the show starts.
SERIES PREMIERE, 12am, AMC
In a move many have deemed crass or opportunistic, AMC brings us this post-Walking Dead talk show hosted by Chris Hardwick, during which special guests and/or actors will discuss the latest episode of The Walking Dead. But honestly, why not have this be a show? We’re going to talk about The Walking Dead amongst ourselves anyway, and basically none of us are as charming as Chris Hardwick. Let’s give it a shot!
Tonight Dexter deals with the surprise reappearance of a serial killer from his past, plus Deb adjusts to her new job as boss lady. But really, the only part that matters is that Travis and Professor Gellar start enacting their next scheme. Their parts are the best!
Tonight Nucky takes advantage of Owen’s munitions knowledge, plus his lawyer figures out how to expand his election-fraud case. Also Philadelphia gangsters somehow factor into their booze-smuggling ventures, and everything basically looks super expensive the whole time.
12am, Cartoon Network
For my money, this show is one of the funniest eleven-minute chunks of TV currently on the air. Tonight, when the University of China, Illinois’ campus is destroyed by a giant baby, the ill-equipped faculty must deal with the situation. Featuring the voices of Greta Gerwig and Hulk Hogan (!).
ORIGINAL SPECIAL, 8pm, Discovery
iGenius: How Steve Jobs Changed the World
Discovery is one of the first networks out of the gate to bring us a posthumous tribute to the great Steve Jobs. Will it be thoughtful and enlightening or a slapdash ratings grab? iDon’tknow. (Apple humor).
PLUS NEW EPISODES OF…
60 Minutes, 7 p.m., CBS
America’s Funniest Home Videos, 7 p.m., ABC
The Task, ORIGINAL MOVIE, 7 p.m., Syfy
Amazing Race, 8 p.m., CBS
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, 8 p.m., ABC
Making Monsters, 8 p.m., Travel Channel
Bridezillas, 9 p.m., WE
Desperate Housewives, 9 p.m., ABC
Masterpiece Mystery!, 9 p.m., PBS
Prowl, ORIGINAL MOVIE, 9 p.m., Syfy
Sister Wives, 9 p.m., TLC
The Good Wife, 9 p.m., CBS
Why Am I Still Single?, SERIES PREMIERE, 9 p.m., VH1
Against the Wall, 10 p.m., Lifetime
CSI: Miami, 10 p.m., CBS
Homeland, 10 p.m., Showtime
Hung, 10 p.m., HBO
Kendra, 10 p.m., E!
Long Island Medium, 10 p.m., TLC
Pan Am, 10 p.m., ABC
Real Housewives of New Jersey, 10 p.m., Bravo
Dirty Soap, 10:30 p.m., E!
How to Make It in America, 10:30 p.m., HBO
Squidbillies, 11:45 p.m., Cartoon Network
What are you watching this weekend?