The Silliest and Dumbest Parts of ‘Star Wars: The Rise of

(This article is 100 % only a listing of main spoilers for “Star Wars Episode IX: The Rise of Skywalker.”)

We’ve had a couple of weeks now to attempt to course of the utter madness of “Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker,” and it has not been straightforward going. There’s simply method an excessive amount of in that film. It’s a lot, in reality, that the discourse continues to be kinda deafening as the whole lot who dislikes the movie appears to have utterly completely different grievances. This isn’t like “The Last Jedi” discourse, the place of us drew ideological battle strains and all parroted the identical speaking factors.

But that’s how loopy this film is. There are main elements of “The Rise of Skywalker” that I swear we’re all simply gonna neglect occurred simply because of us are gonna lose curiosity earlier than we run out of issues to argue about.

But hey, because it’s going to be a couple of years earlier than we’ve one other “Star Wars” film to struggle about, so we will tempo ourselves with the “Rise of Skywalker” discourse for some time. And that can assist you with that, we’ve received right here a listing of issues we didn’t like concerning the final movie within the completely mad new trilogy that you would be able to convey up while you wanna begin a struggle.

So right here you go. Below we’ve received 23 huge gripes about “The Rise of Skywalker.” It’s not an exhaustive listing — such a factor would require me to write down a e book — however we will solely take into consideration this film for therefore lengthy earlier than we go loopy, so this must do for now.

1. One thousand (or extra) Death Stars

Late within the film it’s revealed that this huge fleet of Star Destroyers that Emperor Palpatine pulled out of the ice on Exegol initially of the film was outfitted with Death Star lasers. The reveal is made when one in every of them blows up a planet for no explicit motive. The Resistance of us then briefly huddle up and determine that in all probability all these ships can try this. That looks as if an illogical conclusion to attract, as a result of that might imply the unhealthy guys have a whole fleet of Death Stars, which might be simply probably the most ludicrous factor that has ever occurred in a “Star Wars” film. But for the reason that problem isn’t talked about once more we aren’t positive what different conclusion we may come to.

Also Read: ‘Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker’ Actually Makes ‘The Last Jedi’ and ‘The Force Awakens’ Worse

2. The Rebel fleet from nowhere

To problem all these Death Stars, the Resistance launches an assault on Exegol with solely a Corellian Corvette and like one single fighter squadron and one provider ship stuffed with troops. Fortunately for them, Lando spent a pair hours flying across the galaxy and casually assembling the most important fleet we’ve ever seen in any of those films. That’s completely loopy. Lando was not even gone that lengthy.

3. The Emperor returns earlier than the film begins

There’s a whole lot of artistic selections on this film I can’t even start to know, and probably the most complicated of these is the choice to have Emperor Palpatine make his huge return to the galactic stage between films. How do you convey again a lifeless character and never even allow us to see characters reacting to that revelation because it occurs? This one truly makes me mad. If you’re gonna cram an entire trilogy of tales in a single film, you continue to have to start out initially.

4. Rey is the Emperor’s granddaughter

The climax of the “Skywalker Saga” was about two Palpatine members of the family preventing one another. Incredible.

Also Read: Nothing About Emperor Palpatine’s Return in ‘Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker’ Makes Sense

5. Luke and Leia knew about Rey’s lineage the entire time

This is only a complicated bit. When did they be taught this necessary truth? Why had they by no means finished something with that tidbit of key data? There’s a whole lot of bizarre ramifications to their possession of this information, and “The Rise of Skywalker” has no real interest in exploring any of them.

6. Leia died for no motive

They determined to kill off Leia within the strangest and low-key method: by calling…