Ricky Gervais Uses a Graphic Personal Story to Reveal the Horrors of Aging

Ricky Gervais is giving people the cold hard truth about what it’s like to age.

The British comedian appeared on The Tonight Show Monday where he was asked a variety of questions in a segment called “Random People, Random Questions.” One woman from Chicago asked Gervais, “What is the worst thing about getting older?”

After getting over his apparent shock, Gervais dove into the many, many horrors of aging.

“I don’t know where to start,” Gervais answered candidly. “I wake up in the morning now and go, ‘Oh God I didn’t die.’ I just ache. I look forward to having a drink. At 6 o’clock I have a drink and it’s all OK and I fall into bed. When I get up in the morning I have to walk downstairs like that [waddles]. I’ve got a stiff back and stiff legs. I’m losing the hair. 

“It’s all bad.”

Terrified? So are we.

Despite his diatribe, host Jimmy Fallon asked him to name one specific thing. Gervais’ response: “Pendulous testicles.”

“Honestly,” Gervais quipped. “I’m hoping to live long enough to actually trip over them. I didn’t realize until I was 50 that testicles float in the bath.”

Joking that he’s able to have a deeper bath because he’s made some money over the years, Gervais added that his man parts look like “a couple of little hot hair balloons taking off from the forest.”

Moving past the horrors of growing old, Gervais and Fallon had to answer, “What’s the best thing to say to someone in the middle of a hug?”

Happy to oblige, Gervais and Fallon stood up and hugged each other. Fallon whispered, “I love you,” as his response while Gervais went in a cruder direction.

“Why are we both carrying cucumbers in our pockets?”

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