We’re all going to hell, according to ‘The Good Place’

The premise of “The Good Place” is as preposterous as it is hilarious, and we’re pretty sure this show is going to be our new favorite comedy.

One of the best jokes of the pilot episode had to do with how the universe measures all human deeds, both good and bad, throughout life. Over the course of your life, all deeds earn you positive points or negative points based on where they fall on the good/bad scale.

Some are logical, like helping refugees or purifying water in an African village. Others are … more subjective.

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Obviously, the writing team behind this show had a great time creating the endless list of deeds, and we’ve rounded up some photos for you so you can peruse all of the ones you might have missed while viewing.

We’re big fans of the “remain loyal to the Cleveland Browns” good deed, which will earn you a hearty +53.83 points,  but they should be careful that they don’t lose 53.83 points by “telling a woman to smile.”

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We’re a little alarmed that “end slavery” can earn you +814,292.09, while “commit genocide” will only cost you -433,265.47 points. We’ll leave the debate over which is worse/better to Ethics Professor Tahani Al-Jamil (Jameela Jamil).

The best of the best have to be “fail to disclose camel illness when selling camel” for -22.22 points and “never discuss veganism unprompted” for +9,875.37 points.

We’re going to go ahead and estimate that most of the world’s population has more of these negative deeds on their rap sheet than positive, which explains “The Good Place’s” explanation that only the best of the best make it to the promised land in the sky.

While “The Good Place” premiered Monday (Sept. 19) following “The Voice,” it moves to its regular time slot on Sept. 22 — Thursdays at 10 p.m. ET/PT on NBC.

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