Let the ultimate mommy war begin.
Welcome to Monterey, Calif., where the only thing bigger than the houses are the rivalries between the moms at the elementary school at the center of Big Little lies, HBO’s sexy adaptation of Liane Moriarty‘s best-selling 2014 novel.
In Sunday night’s premiere, we see flashes of a trivia night gone wrong, where one of the parents is murdered: The viewers don’t find out who died and who killed them, as detectives interview all the parents, who are more than happy to dish the dirt (serving as the Greek chorus) surrounding the five women at the center of the drama, played by Reese Witherspoon, Nicole Kidman, Shailene Woodley, Zoe Kravitz and Laura Dern.
Throughout the seven-episodes limited series, E! News is going to do a power-ranking of the five main moms, from needs improvement to class mom of the week…
5. Renata Klein (Laura Dern)
For: She’s a CEO and still managed to make orientation, so points for time management and being a boss. Renata is self-aware, knowing she’s “not liked,” and will do anything to protect her child. And OMG, that house.
Against: Girl, never just assume someone is a nanny and NEVER threaten a first grader. Also, who is still bragging about seeing Hamilton? Get on that Dear Evan Hansen train. (Don’t get us started on her husband, a total cliche complete with the leather jacket.)
4. Celeste Wright (Nicole Kidman)
For: There’s a strength AND fragility to Celeste that’s intriguing, so we find her the most compelling to watch of all the moms, as you’re never quite sure what she’s thinking. From a purely aesthetic level, she and husband Perry (Alexander Skarsgård) win hottest couple, though their marriage is clearly bad news bears. And hi, did you see that house? (Are you sensing a theme here? BLL is total house porn.) She also gets points for being BFFs with Madeline.
Against: She’s an Instagram mom, so clearly, she’s trying to make her imperfect life look perfect, and you could see how much she related to Jane’s monologue about feeling like you are watching yourself in a moment you should be completely happy in. We’re looking forward to watching this one slowly crack.
3. Jane Chapman (Shailene Woodley)
For: The new mom in town, arriving with little other than her son, Ziggy, and some serious emotional baggage, kept her cool pretty well after accusations of bullying were made against her son. And we like that Jane is different from the other Montery mommys, even if another one described her as a “ratty old Prius parked outside a Barney’s.” Most importantly, the bond between Jane and Ziggy feels genuine, and we’re rooting for both to find their way in their new seaside town.
Against: With this group of catty women, Jane needed to stand up for herself, and Ziggy, a little more.
2. Bonnie Carlson (Zoe Kravitz)
For: Nathan’s (James Tupper) new wife Bonnie, for sure, wins hippest mom. She teaches yoga, she makes her own necklaces in Peru and handles her husband’s ex-wife with a surprising amount of grace and tact for her age.
Against: She’s almost too perfect, so sometimes you do just want to punch her in the face, to borrow a line of Jane’s. Oh, and was anyone else surprised Bonnie would sign a petition against the town’s production of Avenue Q?
1. Madeline Martha Mackenzie (Reese Witherspoon)
For: Just being herself? OK, a few specifics. She has so many one-liners, including Bonnie giving “mint-flavored organic blow jobs” and ordering “something chocolate that won’t make my ass look fat,” and is flattered by accusations of plastic surgery. She also gave birth to Chloe, the coolest kid with the best taste in music.
Against: She also gave birth to Abigail, TV’s latest angsty teen out to annoy viewers to death, and allows her husband Ed (Adam Scott) to have that beard. And while she’s able to give Jane a full rundown on the school and each parent, Madeline’s tendency to have her nose in everyone’s business will definitely come back to bite her.
Mom on Top: Madeline! Seriously, this may be Witherspoon’s best role ever (she also serves as an executive producer, along with Kidman). It’s like Madeline is a wine-soaked Elle Woods meets Tracy Flick, just with some more life experience. (We see an Emmy nom in her future, as well as a few others.)
Big Little Lies airs Sundays at 9 p.m. on HBO.
