‘Scream’ Season 2 killer odds: We need to talk about Haley

Oooh, “Scream” is really humming now. Tuesday’s (July 26) episode, “The Orphanage,” confirmed one killer — nailed it! — and did a little shuffling of the remaining suspects. Read on to find out who’s in and who’s out, but be warned of spoilers.

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Before we jump in to the individual suspects, it must be noted that there are two killers running around (at least), a fact that wasn’t confirmed until this episode. With that in mind, someone who was previously eliminated is back on the list.

5. Zoe, 25-1

The show certainly could make Zoe (Kiana Brown) the Billy Loomis of this season, but it just doesn’t quite feel right. Plus, there’s no way she could have been in the costume when Haley (Mary Katherine Duhon) died because A) she was with Noah (John Karna) and B) she’s too short.

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However, there’s still maybe something fishy going on with her. If there are three people working together, our money’s on Zoe to be the third person. Her emailing the audio file to herself and then registering the IP in her own name is the perfect Catherine Tramell (Sharon Stone) defense. In “Basic Instinct,” when someone is murdered in the same fashion as in a fiction writer’s high-novel, the author is the suspect. But Tramell’s defense is, “Why would I kill someone just like how it happens in my book? How stupid do you think I am?”, which is the perfect double-cross if it actually IS her.

Same goes for Zoe.

4. Stavo Acosta, 20-1

Stavo (Santiago Segura) has taken his dad’s place on the suspect list. Firstly, because the sheriff finally explained what the Phoenix incident was and it sounds truthful. Secondly, because from the conversations he has with Maggie (Tracy Middendorf) what is most likely going to happen with regards to the sheriff is that something from his past is indirectly responsible for the killings, so he’ll feel tremendous guilt, but he won’t be the actual killer.

Finally, because the two-killer reveal means that Haley (Mary Katherine Duhon) was in the Brandon James costume in the hotel while Stavo was at the movies with Brooke and the gang. So if he’s her accomplice, that explains that.

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However, he’s still very low in the list because right now the show is trying too hard to make him look suspicious. That generally spells red herring. He seems like a pretty disturbed individual, but the giant blinking sign over his head when he used the phrase “special friend” makes him feel too obvious.

Plus, when Haley was talking to her “special friend” at the party, it didn’t feel like she was in on the killings. Like, maybe she’s been running around doing “pranks” for the killer, like tying Kieran up in the haunted house or sending Emma the audio file or throwing the party with Emma and Audrey’s (Bex Taylor-Klaus) names on the invite, but she’s not actually in on the murder spree. In that case, she wasn’t in the hotel and Stavo’s back to being in the clear.

3. Kieran, 15-1

We just can’t quite kick Emma’s (Willa Fitzgerald) boyfriend off the list. It doesn’t feel like it’s Kieran (Amadeus Serafini), but he did disappear when Haley was getting sliced and diced. There’s also the chance the antics at the carnival were all a fake-out designed to keep suspicion off Kieran. Still, he doesn’t feel as guilty as …

2. Ms. Lang, 10-1

Counselor Lang (Austin Highsmith) is looking more and more suspicious with each passing episode, but at this point, it’s probably more that she knew Piper (Amelia Rose Blaire) and therefore is being used as a scapegoat by the killer. It certainly wasn’t her that Haley was meeting backstage at the party. You know who it probably was …

1. Eli and Haley, 2-1

We’re going to go ahead and do our little victory dance here about Haley. As we said above, she probably wasn’t in on the murdery part of things, but she’s certainly had fun playing mean pranks on the Lakewood Six. This also explains the house fire — jealous Haley wanted to burn up her “special friend,” Eli (Sean Grandillo) because she was suspecting his feelings for Emma were becoming real.

Also, Eli was conspicuously absent this entire episode. He and Haley have taken turns going missing and it’s highly suspicious.

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