The ‘Crazy Ex’ Wedding: Rebecca & Josh… Forever? (We object!)

It’s everything Rebecca Bunch (Rachel Bloom) has ever wanted — at least, ever since she quit her high paying job in New York City and moved across the country to live in West CovinavCA: Josh Chan (Vincent Rodriguez III).

On Friday night (Jan. 13), Josh proposes to Rebecca, and she — against all good judgement, and her therapist literally screaming, “NO!” — says “Yaaaasssss.”

We want to be excited about these upcoming nuptials. Both Josh and Rebecca deserve to be happy. And while these two unquestionably care for each other a great deal, they are not soulmates. Sure, they can post a convincing Facebook picture with endearing hashtags, but in the episode entitled “Will Scarsdale like Josh’s Shayna Punim?” it’s clear neither is ready for such a serious commitment.

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Honestly, our fingers are crossed that these particular “I do”s never happen. With no real career to speak of, or even the premonition that he may one day want to do something more fulfilling than work in the backroom at a speaker store, Josh is little more than a lost naive puppy who can’t be alone. While we don’t question his love for Rebecca, it’s hard to forget he didn’t fight for Rebecca until Anna (Brittany Snow) left him in the lurch. Josh has good intentions, but is still living in rebound land.

Rebecca, on the the hand, is still struggling with some long ignored mental issues. She comes so close… My god, like THIS close to finally diving down that scary spiral of thought that Josh’s love may not be the answer to her problems. That she needs to fix herself before being able to fully accept love from others, oh, and then there her unresolved father abandonment issues.

Dr. Noelle Akopian (Michael Hyatt) Rebecca’s therapist, after seemingly endless fruitless sessions trying to get through to this brick wall of babbling nonsense, is literally in tears listening to Rebecca’s “Oprah moment.”

But then Josh bursts in the door. He gets down on one knee, and presents her with not just any diamond, but the Garfinkel ring — the beloved family heirloom Rebecca pawned to purchase a last-minute plane ticket to Hawaii to chase Josh near the end of Season 1.

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This is the most endearingly intelligent move Josh has made in his entire life. But did he actually remember the time Rebecca told her white-lie version of the Garfinkel ring story? Or did Rebecca’s mom (Tovah Feldshuh) tip him off as to what he could to make her daughter turn to mush, disregard all hesitation and say yes? Naomi Bunch is a narcissistic monster loving mother who struggles expressing her feelings in a nice way…

But like Josh, it’s important to note her intentions are good. Like many women from her generation, it’s more important to be married than not be. It’s been engrained in their brain that no one can possibly be happy without a husband or wife, and while it’s a completely outdated and misguided thought, she just wants her child to be happy.

Well, we all know this is far from what will make Rebecca truly happy — but to play devil’s advocate, what’s wrong exactly with hitching your wagon to someone who loves you unconditionally? Is it a selfish millennial need to want more? To seek those butterfly feelings and oh so important ability to honestly post pictures on Facebook of whatever a perfect relationship should look like?

While attending her cousin’s bar mitzvah in Scarsdale, Rebecca gets into a deep discussion about this with the Rabbi (Patti LuPone! Please come back, again!) and realizes her frustration with Josh is not about him at all, but a projection of her own feelings. It’s a lot to process while surrounded by family dancing the Horah.

Josh and Rebecca aside, we must discuss the amazing disaster of a human being that is Nathan (Scott Michael Foster). Ding! Ding! Ding! Ladies and gentleman, we finally have a character that is way more messed up that Rebecca. With Daddy issues up the ying-yang, and a lethal dose of body dysmorphia, we can not wait to see how he reacts to Rebecca’s marital news, and pretty much whatever storyline his neuroses will now lead.

“Crazy Ex-Girlfriend” airs on Friday nights at 9 p.m. ET/PT on The CW.

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